I came to coaching thinking I needed to figure out my next career move.

I had been at my organization for 15 years, and I worried that staying somewhere for that long would be a disadvantage if I ever needed to get another job. So I thought I should consider doing something new, but I didn't know what that would be.

But my goals for coaching changed pretty quickly once I got started. While I came to think about my career future, coaching led me to consider much bigger questions. 

My coaching sessions helped me think through what I wanted for my life, not just my work. I realized that my job was just one piece of a bigger whole, and that I didn’t want work to be such a big part of my identity.

Taking this holistic view was a big revelation, and it broke open things I hadn’t seen before. From there, coaching helped me uncover more patterns and ways of being that had been running in the background my whole life. 

One of the big ones was the idea that no matter what, you should just push through and make things work.

I tended to set unreasonably high expectations for myself and my team, and I had a harsh inner critic that would speak up if we didn’t meet them. 

I had been bringing that energy into my life, my work, and my leadership, without being fully conscious of it. Coaching helped me clearly see that pattern, and the impact it was having on me and others, for the first time. 

Once I saw this, I started to find a gentler way of being with myself and my team members.

I realized that being hard on myself and my team wasn’t required to be successful, and that I could still reach my goals and make an impact, while giving myself and others more kindness and grace. 

The biggest thing I took from coaching was this kind of awareness.

I can now see patterns like this one coming up in real time and decide what I want to do about them, and how I want to react. This is helping me show up in my work and in the world as the person I want to be, for myself and for my team.

If I could say one thing to someone like me — a leader who has spent a lifetime feeling like they have to have it all figured out, take care of business, and make it work on their own — it's this:

There's a different way to be and to lead, that you can't always see by yourself. 

I know it's hard to make the choice to invest in your own well-being as a leader. But there’s so much value to spending time with a partner who can ask you really great questions, who understands your work in the social sector, and who has your best interests at heart. 

This work went so much deeper than I ever expected. We really got into the fundamentals of how I see the world, and how I lead. Coaching gave me durable skills and ways of being that I'll bring with me through whatever comes next.  

There's so much discord in the world right now, and so many unknowns about the future. I'm very grateful that I had coaching to help me navigate that, and I think everyone should have this kind of experience.