Growth, Change and the Valley of Disappointment

Have you ever felt like you’re working hard, but not seeing results?

Lately I’ve been feeling that way in a few different areas. 

Here’s one example: in January, I committed to going to the gym three times a week.  I’ve been putting in the work – showing up, lifting heavier, pushing myself – but after eight weeks, I hadn’t yet seen the results I was expecting. I was feeling extremely frustrated that my hard work didn’t seem to be paying off. 

Then I got a call that completely shifted my perspective. 

It was my gym, calling to tell me that out of hundreds of people who’d participated in a challenge they’d been running since I joined, I had come in second for the most progress made.

I was completely taken by surprise. Even though I hadn’t seen the results I was expecting on the outside, it turns out my hard work was paying off, and there was a lot of change happening on the inside.

It gave me a burst of motivation to keep going, and it reminded me how easy it is to miss the progress that’s happening beneath the surface.

This phenomenon is something James Clear calls the “Valley of Disappointment” in his book Atomic Habits.

The Valley of Disappointment is that tough stretch when we’re putting in the work, but not yet seeing results. It’s the moment when many people give up on a goal or habit because they think nothing is happening.

But in reality, progress is building beneath the surface. And if we stick with it, we often hit a turning point where results begin to accelerate.

Progress Takes Longer Than We Think – And Then It Takes Off

The key idea here is that we expect progress to be linear, but that’s not the way it actually works.

When we’re working toward a goal, whether that’s learning a new skill, building a new habit, or making a change in our work or lives, our progress is often much slower than we expect at the start.

This often results in frustration, self-doubt, and the desire to give up or change course. But if we persist, we can see a huge acceleration of growth and progress on the other side.

As Clear shares in his book, “Breakthrough moments are often the result of many previous actions, which build up the potential needed to unleash a major change.”

You might be experiencing this right now in your career:

• Maybe you’ve been job searching for months and networking consistently, but you haven’t landed the right opportunity yet.

• Maybe you’re exploring a career transition, and you’ve been doing research and having conversations, but you still don’t feel exactly clear on where you’re headed.

• Maybe you’re developing a new habit or leadership skill and you’ve been putting in the effort, but you still feel like you haven’t figured it out. 

If these ideas resonate, you might be passing through the Valley of Disappointment.

How to Persist Through the Valley of Disappointment

Knowing that this phase is a normal part of any growth or change process can help. But you need tools to help you keep moving through the Valley of Disappointment, so you can get to the great stuff on the other side!

If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated about your progress, here are a few strategies to help you stay motivated:

1. Create Accountability: Whether it’s a coach, mentor, or friend, having someone to check in with can help you stick with it when your motivation dips. Telling someone else about your goal is an important step to build accountability.

2. Find Community: Surrounding yourself with others who are working toward similar goals can keep you engaged and inspired. We all go through ups and downs at different times, and seeing other folks keeping at it will help give you a boost when you need it most (and you’ll do the same for them!). 

3. Track Small Wins: Get clear on the actions you want to consistently take, instead of just focusing on the end result. Track and celebrate milestones along the way, like hitting a certain number of networking meetings or practicing a new leadership skill each week. 

These strategies can help you push through uncertainty and stay on track, even when results feel slow.

Trust the Process: Growth Happens Beneath the Surface

To share one more example of how this process shows up, spring has felt SO slow to arrive here in the Northeast this year. I’ve found myself grumbling that it’s still so cold, and that barely anything is blooming yet.

And while I’m still waiting for spring to fully arrive, this week I went for a walk and noticed that seemingly overnight, new plants had sprouted and trees were budding.

While I haven’t been able to see it, the plants have been growing all along beneath the surface, and soon enough everything will be in bloom.

Remember that just like the plants that bloom after weeks of unseen growth, your efforts are building momentum – even if you can’t see it yet. 

Of course, if you’ve been working at something for a while and you truly see no progress, it may be time to adjust your approach. But before you decide to pivot, ask yourself: Have I given it enough of a chance? Or am I just in the Valley of Disappointment?

Because sometimes, just when we’re about to give up, a breakthrough is right around the corner.

If you’d like partnership as you work toward your next breakthrough, contact us about our coaching programs for impact professionals.